So when Eric and I started to get into some of the smaller details when it came to wedding planning, we found ourselves questioning certain aspects of traditional weddings and whether or not we wanted to include that in our day. We are not terribly traditional, nor do we want a boring, cookie cutter wedding that our guests can’t wait to get out of and go somewhere more fun. We also have a budget to stick to, so we need to decide what's really important to us and what we can feel comfortable letting go. So today I thought I’d share with you some of the things we’ve been discussing and whether or not we’re going to incorporate it into our big day.
Engagement photos
Luckily, we were both on the same page with this one. We don’t see any need at all to spend
thousands of dollars on photos of us in our plain clothes. Wedding photos? Ultra important. Engagement photos? It was hard to come up with a reason
why. Because that’s what you do? To send out Christmas cards? For a Save The Date card maybe? To get comfortable in front of the
camera? We both just thought it was kind
of a waste of cash, and we’d rather put that money towards getting a really
awesome photographer for the wedding.
Now, I’ve talked to some other brides that have said when you book the
photographer for the wedding date, sometimes they will throw in an engagement
session for free! In that case, we
probably will but otherwise, we’re saving that dough for when we’re all dolled
up. (And we came up with a really
awesome idea for a Save The Date card that will only require one photo of us,
and we can do it quick and easy! Boom.)
Verdict: Nope.
Open Bar
Oooh, the everlasting wedding argument. Do you let your guests go wild on your
dime? Or make them bring cash to your
party if they want to indulge? I can
definitely see both sides of this argument.
If you have an open bar, a lot of times people will get hammered, leave
half full drinks everywhere, and a lot gets wasted that the bride and groom
still have to pay for. On the other
hand, a lot of wedding guests say a cash bar is a hassle and just reduce the
presentation they offer the couple to pay for their drinks. Regardless of the pros and cons of each, it
is very important to us to have an open bar for our guests. We enjoy our bevies, our friends like to
drink (a lot, as evidenced by our engagement party) and we know a lot of our
other guests enjoy a sip or two now and then...Dance Moms, I’m lookin’ at
you. We don’t want our guests worrying
about paying for drinks, we just want them to have a great time. This is why it was important that the venue
we book allows us to bring in our own booze.
We want to have premium liquor and a signature drink
(cosmopolitans...natch), and we also have a little something extra planned
between the ceremony and reception...
Verdict: Drink and be
married!
Wave your hands in the air like you just don’t care!
This could be you.
Groom’s Cake
Neither Eric nor my dad (affectionately dubbed FOB on this
blog) had heard of a Groom’s Cake before.
Basically this is a way for the groom to be recognized and represented
on the cake table. The wedding cake
itself is usually a tall, white, sparkly beast – all things bride. Groom’s Cakes are fun because
they allow for the groom’s interests to be displayed at the wedding. When I first brought up the idea to Eric, he
was sort of indifferent and asked a few questions, particularly what would be
on it. When I said that it usually is
the groom’s favorite sports team or something like that, he said “You had me at
Oakland Raiders.” Now, a Groom’s Cake
would normally be considered a splurge because as we all know, wedding cakes
are usually pretty expensive. But
because MOB is also the Cake Boss Supreme, we’ll be able to get Eric a ridiculously
awesome cake for just the price of a few hugs.
Right mom? Right?
Verdict: RAIDER
NATION!
Like this, but way better.
Have you seen my mom’s cakes?
Check them out.
Awkward Wedding Party Dance
Why? Just why. The only reason I can think of why people do this is because it’s a tradition. That is not a good enough reason to slam your bridesmaids and groomsmen together for 4 minutes of pure awkwardness. I liken this dance to kids at a junior high dance. You can’t dance too closely, but it’s also weird if you’re too far away. You can’t chatter in their ear the whole time, but it’s also weird if you don’t talk at all. You can make some small talk, but you are also three inches from their face. It’s creepy to look them in the eye the whole time, but you also don’t want to be looking around either so your partner feels like you’re counting down the seconds until Amazed by Lonestar is over even though really, they feel the same way. Nobody needs to see our wedding party dance with each other. We want everyone up on the dance floor right away! Finish your dinner and let’s party!
Verdict: Save it for
the sock hop.
Pretty much looks EXACTLY like this.
Bouquet and Garter Toss
Yet another tradition that nobody seems to question and
therefore it’s included at every wedding.
Let’s break this down. When a
single girl is at a wedding, she’s probably feeling a few pangs of jealousy as
it is. Not saying that every single girl
is dying to get married, but I’m sure there are a few fleeting moments of
wondering when her prince charming is going to come along. Do you think it makes said single girl feel
better when suddenly, the party is stopped.
The lights go on. The DJ booms
over the microphone “LET’S GET ALL THE SINGLE LADIES ON THE DANCE FLOOR!” Then people around her start pointing it out
to her. “Go on, you’re
siiiiinglllllle! Get up therrrrrre!” So she begrudgingly goes to the dance floor
with all the other single girls, on display for everyone to see. Yes everyone, I’m single! Take a look!
Nope, no man over here! Then the
bride turns her back and shuns her poor, lonely single friends, and tosses her
bridal bouquet over her shoulder. Take my used scraps losers, I’m married now! And
since it’s well known that the bridal bouquet is the last chance any of these
single girls have at romantic happiness, things can get a little vicious. Clawing, pushing, shoving, scratching...until
finally, one single girl emerges victorious and can dream of the day she gets
to throw a bunch of flowers in her single friends’ faces.
As for the garter toss, hilarious. For as excited as the single girls get when
they see the trajectory of the bouquet heading straight toward them, the guys
could not care less. Most of them are
three sheets to the wind already and don’t even know what they are doing up
there. Not to mention the awkward moment
where the bride has to sit on a chair and her groom has to root around under
her dress to find the thing. And if it
takes any longer than 8 seconds, people lose interest. Why stop the party for this? Worst.
Verdict:
This tradition needs to die. Now.
Could this be more awkward?
Fireworks
Come on, a girl can dream can’t she?
Verdict: I think they
are illegal downtown. But if I could get
away with it, I would.
Funny story: When I asked
for Eric’s input on this list, he came up with tons of good examples and the
list ended up needing to be split into 2 parts.
Then he goes, “your shoes? ;)” My
groom thinks he’s pretty funny! But
seriously, those were never anywhere but the “Absolutely Necessary” category.
Happy Wedding Wednesday!!!
~M
