Details, Details

So I've been dealing a lot with wedding vendors lately.  I've had countless emails, phone calls, and meetings with all sorts of people regarding our wedding.  It's been hectic dealing with all the vendors, trying to ensure every aspect of the wedding is covered, trying to ensure it all fits in the budget, and making sure everything coordinates together.  I am not even going to lie about my feelings.

I LOVE IT.

Faaaaaabuloussssss!

 

 

I posted a FB status the other day about how my favorite part of wedding planning is meeting with vendors.  For who else can you sit there and talk about the smallest details of your wedding, your vision, your overall theme, how you want ostrich feathers in your bouquet because you feel their uniqueness, texture and movement matches with the soft yet fashion forward quality of your dress, how your 3 year old niece is going to wear a pair of Swarovski crystal-encrusted shoes, and how you prefer pintuck to plain and eggplant to indigo.  And they don't judge you.  They don't try to change the subject.  They don't think any of your ideas are bad or disagree that you should actually send out Save the Date cards because their friend Cindy from work didn't and she regretted it.  They sit and listen as you babble on about your day nonstop, only interrupting to excitedly agree with everything that you've planned and tell you how perfect it is.  I know that they're probably hiding any negative opinions they may have and their primary goal is to get my business and my money, and I don't care.  They are a captive audience and I.  Love.  It.

 

To be truthful, I can tell which vendors love their work and which vendors are going through the motions to make a buck.  I think it takes a special type of person to be involved in the business of weddings, where cash is king and women are crazy.  I have such a respect for vendors that love what they do so much, that putting up with bridezillas week in and week out is worth it to them.  So when looking for people that are going to be in charge of HUGE parts of our special day, personality matters as much as price.

 

 

 

 

"Yes Mickaela, I agree, the vintage trend is SOOOO overdone..."

 

 

So in talking a lot about all these little details, I've come across several (and I mean several) opportunities to spend just a little bit more here, and a little bit more there, to get these extra things, and upgrade to that, etc.  It becomes a little overwhelming to dissect a quote and figure out what's going to mean enough to you to spend the extra cash and what you can do without.  When I'm not sure about those details, I usually use the Google machine to see what other brides have said about it.  In doing so, I found a very interesting article about the top 5 biggest money wasters in wedding planning.  So I thought I'd share that today with some of my thoughts!

 

 

5.  Meaningless and Expensive Wedding Favors.  "Your guests' presence is a present, indeed, but you don't have to pay them back with custom-printed tchotchkes that you might end up lugging home or tossing in the trash."

 

I do agree with this one.  When Eric and I were first looking at favors, we really wanted them to be representative of us and our shared love of wine, and something that our guests would actually use.  But at $6 to $10 a pop, an engraved corkscrew for every guest was putting our budget in the stratosphere.  So we looked at bottle stoppers, glasses, all sorts of things.  But when we finally decided on the cookies that you can read about in this post, it was the perfect fit.  They are Eric's favorite, people love to eat, and with how delicious they are there is less of a chance they will end up left on the table at the end of the night.  But if they are, it's okay because we didn't break the bank.  And fine, maybe we will find a good home for them.  ;)

 

 

 

LOL.  Cookie Monster DOES do that...

 

 

 

4.  The Dress.  "On one hand, it's a once in a lifetime occasion. On the other, it's just that -- once -- that you'll only be wearing your wedding dress, so do you really want to spend a couple of mortgage payments on it?"

Um, YEAH.  Next.

But seriously though, I do understand some people's stance on this.  Yes, you only wear it once.  But while I don't believe that your wedding day is the happiest day of your life (at least I hope it's not!), I DO believe that your wedding dress is the most important garment you will ever wear.  It is also a day where ALL EYES are on you.  So an ill-fitted Kijiji purchased satin disaster will not suffice.  I don't think this is a place to skimp.  A bride should look and feel her best, so I don't think spending a little more is a "waste".  To a point, of course.  When you're just paying for the designer label then yes, it's a waste.  Like this Pnina Tornai monstrosity, which was $34,000..............

 

Mother of God.

 

 

 

3.  Huge Wedding Cakes.  "Some couples only invite 50 guests, but they still order a cake that serves 300. With cakes going for $2-$15 a slice, that extra size adds up quickly."

 

I don't have this problem because my MOB is a Cake Boss and is making us a glorious wedding cake made of dummies, with a real tier on top just for us two.  But even if she wasn't, I still don't think we would be having real cake.  Nobody loves wedding cake.  Nobody walks away from a wedding going, "Damn, that cake was the best damn thing I've ever had in my mouth.  I would get a room with that cake.  I would show that cake a good time."  And now, with most meals served at weddings that include some kind of fancy dessert, there is no need to double-dessert and also serve wedding cake.  So agree.  Big waste of cash.

 

 

 

Am I actually seeing this?

 

 

 

2.  Printed Programs and Menus.  "Everyone there is there for your wedding, and if they don't know who the bride and groom are then they shouldn't be there.  Spend less money telling them what they're going to eat and more money on the actual food!"

 

Okay hold on.  I'm all for cutting costs, but this is going a little far.  Yes everyone that is going to the wedding should have some working knowledge of the bride and groom.  But what about all the other people standing up there?  Hey, who are those chicks in dresses?  How do they know the bride?  Why is there a guy standing on the girls side?  Which one of them is Eric's brother again?  Who is that lady marrying them?  She seems to know them.  Does she know them?  I know Eric's parents, what are Mickaela's parents names?  Wait, who is this MC guy?  How does he know the couple?  If ONLY there were some way of figuring all this out!  Our programs are like $1.75 each or something.  Not a huge price to pay to introduce our guests to all the people that are most important to our day.

 

And menus, well, I like to know what I'm going to eat.  And same thing, they are not that expensive.  I would hardly say this is the #2 money waster!  Unless the menus are being printed on $100 bills.

 

 

 

Come on, this is freakin' cute!  And fun!

 

 

 

1.  Endless Mementos.  "The wedding industry loves to sell you on keepsakes.  Does your wedding album need to be preserved in a 50 pound, leather bound book with a glass cover?  Do you really need a personalized pen to sign the guest book? Is preserving your dress and bouquet worth the money and the space in your home? And does every toasting glass, picture frame, and photo album need to be monogrammed with your wedding date?"

 

I can totally see this one.  Wedding albums especially.  When we were meeting with photographers, they would bring out the big kahuna album to show off all their best prints, and while the album was beautiful and looking at the pictures through my misty bride eyes affected my judgement ($3,000 for a book of pictures of the wedding?  Seems reasonable.) I have to admit that I feel like this is a place where couples get absolutely gouged.  I do want a nice album of our wedding photos and some framed photos of us and some special items to remember the day, but I don't think it needs to go into overdrive with preserving the dress and making your home a shrine to your wedding.  As I said before, I don't think your wedding day should be the happiest day of your life!  It should be all the days after!  I'd rather spend money on more happy days with my boo!

 

 

 

He's going to be horrified that I called him my boo.

 

 

 

Happy Wedding Wednesday!!!

 

 

~M

 



Wedding Traditions: Yay or Nay? (Part 1)

So when Eric and I started to get into some of the smaller details when it came to wedding planning, we found ourselves questioning certain aspects of traditional weddings and whether or not we wanted to include that in our day.  We are not terribly traditional, nor do we want a boring, cookie cutter wedding that our guests can’t wait to get out of and go somewhere more fun.  We also have a budget to stick to, so we need to decide what's really important to us and what we can feel comfortable letting go.  So today I thought I’d share with you some of the things we’ve been discussing and whether or not we’re going to incorporate it into our big day.

 

Engagement photos

Luckily, we were both on the same page with this one.  We don’t see any need at all to spend thousands of dollars on photos of us in our plain clothes.  Wedding photos?  Ultra important.  Engagement photos?  It was hard to come up with a reason why.  Because that’s what you do?  To send out Christmas cards?  For a Save The Date card maybe?  To get comfortable in front of the camera?  We both just thought it was kind of a waste of cash, and we’d rather put that money towards getting a really awesome photographer for the wedding.  Now, I’ve talked to some other brides that have said when you book the photographer for the wedding date, sometimes they will throw in an engagement session for free!  In that case, we probably will but otherwise, we’re saving that dough for when we’re all dolled up.  (And we came up with a really awesome idea for a Save The Date card that will only require one photo of us, and we can do it quick and easy!  Boom.)

Verdict:  Nope.

 

Cute, but we can really do that anytime.

 

Open Bar

Oooh, the everlasting wedding argument.  Do you let your guests go wild on your dime?  Or make them bring cash to your party if they want to indulge?  I can definitely see both sides of this argument.  If you have an open bar, a lot of times people will get hammered, leave half full drinks everywhere, and a lot gets wasted that the bride and groom still have to pay for.  On the other hand, a lot of wedding guests say a cash bar is a hassle and just reduce the presentation they offer the couple to pay for their drinks.  Regardless of the pros and cons of each, it is very important to us to have an open bar for our guests.  We enjoy our bevies, our friends like to drink (a lot, as evidenced by our engagement party) and we know a lot of our other guests enjoy a sip or two now and then...Dance Moms, I’m lookin’ at you.  We don’t want our guests worrying about paying for drinks, we just want them to have a great time.  This is why it was important that the venue we book allows us to bring in our own booze.  We want to have premium liquor and a signature drink (cosmopolitans...natch), and we also have a little something extra planned between the ceremony and reception... 

Verdict:  Drink and be married!

 

Wave your hands in the air like you just don’t care!

 

 

 

This could be you.

 

Groom’s Cake

Neither Eric nor my dad (affectionately dubbed FOB on this blog) had heard of a Groom’s Cake before.  Basically this is a way for the groom to be recognized and represented on the cake table.  The wedding cake itself is usually a tall, white, sparkly beast – all things bride.  Groom’s Cakes are fun because they allow for the groom’s interests to be displayed at the wedding.  When I first brought up the idea to Eric, he was sort of indifferent and asked a few questions, particularly what would be on it.  When I said that it usually is the groom’s favorite sports team or something like that, he said “You had me at Oakland Raiders.”  Now, a Groom’s Cake would normally be considered a splurge because as we all know, wedding cakes are usually pretty expensive.  But because MOB is also the Cake Boss Supreme, we’ll be able to get Eric a ridiculously awesome cake for just the price of a few hugs.  Right mom?  Right? 

Verdict:  RAIDER NATION!

 

Like this, but way better.  Have you seen my mom’s cakes?  Check them out.

 

Awkward Wedding Party Dance

Why?  Just why.  The only reason I can think of why people do this is because it’s a tradition.  That is not a good enough reason to slam your bridesmaids and groomsmen together for 4 minutes of pure awkwardness.  I liken this dance to kids at a junior high dance.  You can’t dance too closely, but it’s also weird if you’re too far away.  You can’t chatter in their ear the whole time, but it’s also weird if you don’t talk at all.  You can make some small talk, but you are also three inches from their face.  It’s creepy to look them in the eye the whole time, but you also don’t want to be looking around either so your partner feels like you’re counting down the seconds until Amazed by Lonestar is over even though really, they feel the same way.  Nobody needs to see our wedding party dance with each other.  We want everyone up on the dance floor right away!  Finish your dinner and let’s party!

Verdict:  Save it for the sock hop.

 

Pretty much looks EXACTLY like this.

 

Bouquet and Garter Toss

Yet another tradition that nobody seems to question and therefore it’s included at every wedding.  Let’s break this down.  When a single girl is at a wedding, she’s probably feeling a few pangs of jealousy as it is.  Not saying that every single girl is dying to get married, but I’m sure there are a few fleeting moments of wondering when her prince charming is going to come along.  Do you think it makes said single girl feel better when suddenly, the party is stopped.  The lights go on.  The DJ booms over the microphone “LET’S GET ALL THE SINGLE LADIES ON THE DANCE FLOOR!”  Then people around her start pointing it out to her.  “Go on, you’re siiiiinglllllle!  Get up therrrrrre!”  So she begrudgingly goes to the dance floor with all the other single girls, on display for everyone to see.  Yes everyone, I’m single!  Take a look!  Nope, no man over here!  Then the bride turns her back and shuns her poor, lonely single friends, and tosses her bridal bouquet over her shoulder.  Take my used scraps losers, I’m married now!  And since it’s well known that the bridal bouquet is the last chance any of these single girls have at romantic happiness, things can get a little vicious.  Clawing, pushing, shoving, scratching...until finally, one single girl emerges victorious and can dream of the day she gets to throw a bunch of flowers in her single friends’ faces. 

 

 

Let’s tear it to pieces in a humiliating display of self-loathing!

As for the garter toss, hilarious.  For as excited as the single girls get when they see the trajectory of the bouquet heading straight toward them, the guys could not care less.  Most of them are three sheets to the wind already and don’t even know what they are doing up there.  Not to mention the awkward moment where the bride has to sit on a chair and her groom has to root around under her dress to find the thing.  And if it takes any longer than 8 seconds, people lose interest.  Why stop the party for this?  Worst.

Verdict:  This tradition needs to die.  Now.

 

 

Could this be more awkward?

 

Fireworks

 

 

Come on, a girl can dream can’t she?

 

Verdict:  I think they are illegal downtown.  But if I could get away with it, I would.

 

Funny story:  When I asked for Eric’s input on this list, he came up with tons of good examples and the list ended up needing to be split into 2 parts.  Then he goes, “your shoes? ;)”  My groom thinks he’s pretty funny!  But seriously, those were never anywhere but the “Absolutely Necessary” category.

 

Happy Wedding Wednesday!!!

~M

A Grand Celebration!

This past weekend Eric and I celebrated our engagement with our family and close friends at our engagement party, hosted by our parents at my MOH’s beautiful home.  I am so happy to be engaged to my handsome fiancé and was very excited to celebrate our upcoming nuptials!

 

“I love you.  And I just wanted to shout it from the top of a mountain.  But I didn’t have a mountain.  I had an engagement party.”

 

I ordered the invitations from Wedding Paper Divas.  I love this website, especially all the customization features and the fact that the invitations are budget-friendly.  We were able to put anything we wanted on it, and even included a photo from our proposal on the back. 

Eric’s middle name is Andrew.  Not Jehoshephat.  Long story for another blog post...

 

Of course, my DIY streak was in full force and I wanted a keepsake for each guest to take away from the party without breaking the bank.  I picked up champagne glasses from Dollarama for $1 each (love Dollarama!) and rhinestones from Michael’s, and decorated each one.  Then I had my MOH, who is also Scrapbooking Queen Supreme, make a pretty tag for each glass with a message from us.  We used the glasses for the toast at the party, and guests got to take them home! 

 

Bling!

 

 

 

Our little thank you...

 

 

 

Ready for the toast!

 

I was overwhelmed at how much our family and friends came together and helped with the party.  MOB, who is also Cake Boss Supreme, made us a pretty engagement cake along with some ultra yummy red velvet cupcakes that were positively to die for.  They were all decorated so beautifully – I loved it all!

 

So pretty!

 

 

 

Eric and I got special cupcakes on the top tier...

 

 

 

The theme is “bling”.  Can you tell?

 

Eric’s parents made the most fabulous cheese spread I have ever seen with every type of cheese imaginable, and even made cute little signs to stick in the cheese.  Eric’s brother Adam brought a yummy fruit platter, Eric’s sister Marita made delicious punch, and we had hors d’oeuvres catered by Amici Catering.  It was all very tasty!

 

We also received a special set of engagement presents from our parents!  I have been eyeing the Swarovski Crystal Champagne Flutes for a while, for Eric and I to have as our toasting flutes at the wedding.  They have a crystal base as well as hundreds of tiny crystals in the stem.  They are positively divine and I couldn’t imagine us using anything else to toast to our new life together. 

 

SQUEE.

 

So I was shocked and delighted when we opened a box from my parents to reveal these gorgeous goblets, and then unwrapped a bottle of very fine champagne from France from Eric’s parents!  So thankful and so excited!!!

 

Look at that handsome man....

 

All in all we had a fantastic engagement party and fun was had well into the night.  I want to thank everyone who attended and made it so special for Eric and I, we are overwhelmed by your love and generosity.  <3

 

 

One happy couple!

 

Happy Wedding Wednesday!!!

 

~M